In Case of Illness—Communicate!

Communication is a sharing of ideas, thoughts, concerns, feelings. It’s an important tool in your “medicine chest.” Illness, especially chronic illness, can be discouraging and frustrating for all involved. So it’s essential to:

· Communicate with your doctor. Learn all you can about your condition and what to expect. Discuss your symptoms, how medicines are affecting you, the effects on your life. Be active in the process—don’t let others make important decisions for you, but be sure you have all the information you need. And listen! Be sure you understand the doctor’s instructions and explanations. If you don’t, tell him or her. Don’t be embarrassed because you don’t speak “medicalese.” Misunderstanding a doctor’s words can be quite dangerous.
· Communicate with others. Develop a “support group” of folks who will encourage and understand. This might include friends, people at your church, your family certainly, and perhaps an actual support group of people experiencing the same problem as you.
· Communicate with your spouse. Don’t be a lone ranger. Your illness and changes in your life have profound effects on those closest to you. You may not be able to work or to physically care for yourself. Talk honestly about feelings and concerns. And listen—communication involves more than letting your own feelings be heard. This is a high stress issue for you both and not the time to be super-sensitive about what is said. Put yourself in your spouse’s place and make an effort to understand his/her concerns. It’s my belief that all couples ought to share their preferences about end-of-life treatments with each other as well.*
· Communicate with your children. Don’t try to hide the truth from them. Not knowing is often more frightening than whatever the truth might be.

Keep the channels open to those around you. Isolating yourself increases the depression and anxiety that may come with illness.


*For information on these decisions, I recommend http://wings.buffalo.edu/faculty/research/bioethics/lwill.html. While some of the information may be out-of-date, the article presents a clear discussion of the issues involved.